So if you read Barstool at all (by now you should) then you know they have a serious ailment over there and his name is Zollo. He's their "music guy", but that's really only if you consider computer bleeps and repetitive baselines mixed with vague, obscure lyrics music. Personally, I do not. You know how some music seems better when you're high? Well other music is not even remotely good unless you're high, and that's precisely the type of music that he not only listens to, but bases his reputation on. It's the type of "music" that people on ecstasy and Molly think is amazing but then when they come down and listen to it sober they realize its straight garbage so they take another hit, wait for that shit to kick in, and then, and only then, are they incoherent enough to withstand it's inadequacy. Listen, I don't want to sound dramatic here but I'm pretty sure Zollo's music is the reason people overdose on drugs. Shitty dubstep, the occasional underwhelming remix, electronic pop, basically nothing short of audible garbage that forces the listener to ingest mass amounts of chemicals in order to make listening bearable. It's a vicious cycle.
So every once in awhile, I am going to put up a playlist in the hopes that one of the bloggers might catch a glimpse and toss a song or two onto the site. In all honesty I'm obviously trying to get a job working for the Stool (shooting for the stars here), but this is for the Stoolies more than anything. If Barstool is going to offer a music page then I think it's reasonable to ask that there be actual music on it every now and then. Oh, and I've decided when I'm pitching songs or anything music related then I go from normal, boring Slim to Slimberlake. I know what you're thinking. Lava hot. And don't worry, every song comes with a lyric video so you can feel free to sing along because that's the way it should be.
Just a heads up, all of these songs have actual instruments and real people singing so if you're into Zollo's stuff then you will probably hate these.
1.) Portugal. The Man - Modern Jesus
2.) Portgual. The Man - Creep in a T-Shirt
3.) Arctic Monkeys - Do I Wanna Know
4.) Arctic Monkeys - Stop the World I Wanna Get Off With You
5.) Grouplove - Ways to Go
6.) Grouplove - Shark Attack
7.) We Are Twin - The Way We Touch
8.) Boy and Bear - Feeding Line
9.) Boy and Bear - Southern Sun
10.) The Zolas - Knot in My Heart
11.) The Airborne Toxic Event - Hell and Back
12.) Moondust - Jaymes Young (this song isn't even that great but for some reason I feel like it would just be an awesome song to bang a chick to)
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