Fasten your seat belts, the shackles are off Miley

What did I say? Hey Miley, if you really want to grab the crazy by the balls the only way to do it is ditch that wet fucking blanket you call a fiance. Next thing you know the baddest bitch in entertainment is trading in that Australian disco stick for some fresh meat. Shackles are off, game on, LET'S FUCKING GO! Can't wait for all the traditional rebellious starlet guarantees: cooter shots, nip slips, throwing the fact that she smokes cigarettes in our faces to help fully comprehend just how rebellious she is. I'm not gonna lie I'm a little chubbed just thinking about all the slutty things she's gonna do. You think the MTV Awards were something, just you wait and see what she has in store for us, so much dickwrecking and drug use, so many mug shots, maybe a violent crime or two if we're lucky, jesus who knows. Literally so much potential right here, and all this with Miles' 21st birthday right around the corner. Convenient timing? Yeah I'd say so. Say whatever you want about how she's been drinking and doing drugs forever and her 21st isn't a big deal, but let's be honest there isn't a single kid in America that doesn't go off on their 21st. It's a rite of passage, everybody knows that, and oh my god what I wouldn't give to be invited to that fucking party. Absolute blowout, biggest lock of the century. Drugs, strippers, possible bestiality, and a sex-crazed, unfathomably unsober* Miley Cyrus acting as ringleader to the whole charade. Sounds decent I guess.

If that face doesn't say Cock Fiend then what the hell does?

*Unsober's not a real word. Go figure.