Wednesday, January 29, 2014

The Biebs Just Turned Himself In to the Toronto Mounties on an Assault Beef






(Source) - Justin Bieber’s criminal problems just crossed the border.

The pop star turned himself in to Toronto cops Wednesday to face a charge in connection with an alleged assault on a limo driver in late December, according to reports.

Bieber, 19, will be charged at a local police station with a notice to appear at a later date, CBC News said a call to Toronto Police was not immediately returned Wednesday.

According to cops, a limo driver was driving a group that included the “Boyfriend” singer after they attended a Toronto Maple Leafs hockey game on Dec. 29.

“The limo driver called police saying he was assaulted by one of his fares, and his fare included the entourage of Justin Bieber,” Constable Victor Kwong with the Toronto Police Service previously told the Daily News.





Psh, a real rebel would have evaded the Mounties like a boss.  Seriously though, this is classic Biebs.  Do I actually think that he assaulted anyone?  Absolutely not, he's way too big of a pussy for that kind of stuff. The second this kid tries to physically confront an actual adult-sized person is the same second that he signs his own death certificate.  Plus if it actually was Bieber the limo driver would have said, "Yeah, it was that little fuck J Biebs and I want to sue him for millions of dollars," not "Yes, the Bieber was present at the time." But goddamn if this little cuntbag isn't PR savvy.  Recent arrest, the "Bad Boy Biebs" rumors are swirling about, Obama is reviewing some bullshit petition to get him deported - it's the perfect time to head back to Canada and take the rap for some trouble that one of his larger, rowdier secret bodyguard bros for sure started.  Biebs was probably in the back seat trying to decide whether or not he should wear his tight leather pants, baggy leather shirt, or both to the wild Canadian after party he was heading to and whether or not he should wear matching black earrings.  But with the whole big, bad Biebs rep in full swing he figured why not cash in?  Make the world think I'm trouble, let the ladies know I'm unpredictable, and on top of all that get my buddy off on charges. That's win, win, win.







PS - Why does Biebs flex as hard as he can every time he takes a picture?  Bro, we KNOW you're a tiny little pussnugget, you realize we have eyes right?  You don't need to keep flexing for our sake this isn't a Mr. Universe competition.  You're a pop singer dude, no one's expecting you to be a beast.







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